i am rhonel

This blog shares my sacred journey through tragedy.  I was called for audacious hope whilst grieving a living loss.  And I had to choose – will I be better or bitter? 

She is turning 8 years old on Thursday. And I am looking for a gift. I wish she could tell me what she wants, what her interests are, what she dreams about. The reality is that Juneldè is freed from this materialistic life of wants. She lives a life far above anything money can buy.  And yet I continue to aimlessly browse through catalogues; searching, searching, searching…Because Christmas is also coming up and I want to give her the perfect gift!

And in a moment of epiphany I am reminded of the recent Christmas production I was a part of, and the words I repeatedly shared with the congregation.

Christmas is the perfect season to embrace your imperfect life!

I remember all her birthdays and our Christmases since January 2013, the first year accompanied by immense sadness and an overwhelming urge to hide away. The bright lights, Christmas trees, jingle bells and laughter an almost mockery to my grieving heart. And every year since our Decembers seem to emphasise our brokenness and the strict contrast between our before and after.

I don’t know what 2017 held for you. Maybe you too want to push a fast forward button towards the new year. Or maybe you want to ignore all imperfections and act out a picture perfect season.

The reality is that our strive towards perfection is a lie, and imperfection the truth.  Perfection is an unobtainable dream…

Christmas is however the perfect season to embrace your imperfect life!

This year I want to focus on my imperfect, perfect for me, family. I have bought small gifts, that will be exchanged with big love, acceptance and joy. I am looking forward to celebrating Juneldè’s birthday, not sad about what could or should have been, but content with what is…I plan to allow God’s perfect peace to carry me in an imperfect world.

Christmas is the perfect season to embrace your imperfect life!


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